Nihilism

by Dead

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1.
02:58
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08:28
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about

“Forever I shall be, the wanderer, lost in a sea of desolation.”


“I began writing this album in late 2015 as a way to cope with the worst depression I’ve ever felt in, what was, the worst year of my life. The cause isn’t important, as it is no longer important to me, but I will tell you I’ve never been at a lower point for confidence, self-image, or happiness. I spent a lot of time sulking in dark rooms pouring my depression into the guitar, and slowly, I crafted a concept, a character to mirror my emotions, someone I could reflect on and fantasize into something more fantastic. Through this character I expressed my disdain for the world. He expresses all my rage, my disgust, my fear, my sorrow, and my, at the time, total and complete longing for death, for nothingness to wash over me and take me away from the constant pain of being. This album is the single most personal thing I’ve ever written, I quite literally recorded my real pain and sorrow into these tracks, sulking and delving deeper into these emotions before every tracking session. I welcome you to experience my sorrow and grief and proudly present Nihilism.” - Heathen


Dead is -

Heathen: Vocals (Tracks 2,3,5), Guitar, Bass

Kohld: Drums, Synth, Vocals (Track 4)

credits

released March 20, 2017

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Dead Kalispell, montana

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Track Name: Nihilism I: Existence
There is no purpose
No use in existence
Our lives are meaningless

Everything you hold dear
Holds no value
It’s all worthless
It’s all bullshit

Everything that makes you happy
Will crush you
Will break you down to nothing
What you truly are
Then you will know the truth
What I already know

That there is no purpose
No use in existence
That our lives are meaningless

Everything you hold dear
Is nothingness
Its all pointless
Its all in vain

Everything that makes you smile
Will blow away
Crumple in the wind
Reduce you to tears
Burn you to ashes
Grid you to dust
Track Name: Nihilism II: Unwavering Darkness
I cannot see this world
That I have found myself in
No light may penetrate
This cosmic void
Bottomless emptiness
Fills my chest
Nothing can keep me going
Nothing can save me now

I cannot find my way out, I have no guiding light
What can I do now but crawl forward
And hope that someday I will find the edge
Of this unwavering darkness

What is man
But yet another beast
Scrounging in the dirt
Trying to find some purpose in this
We are
pure insignificance
What meaning is there to be found?
Does anything really matter?

No!


A wave of ice slowly creeps into my skin
My flesh begins to tremble, my eyes lose focus, my limbs weaken

I begin to fall

I know not what can be done
I know not what lies in store
For I have lost all direction
For I have lost all purpose

I begin to wander
The bleak and desolate wastes
I have found myself in chains
Slowly growing colder with each step
I hope the next may be my last
For I long for the sun to set on my life
The dusk of my existence
The sweet kiss of nothing

All that was once bright
Now lays dead and dormant
No light touches this hallowed ground
Thick cracks carve its surface
Thick cracks carve my surface

I begin to fade

Forever I shall be, the wanderer
Lost in a sea of desolation
Track Name: Dead
Wandering the frozen wastes
I have lost all direction
I grow tired of this existence
It no longer brings me pleasure
Nothing feels purposeful anymore
I’m simply going through the motions
I feel a painful sorrow
A solemn acceptance of what truly is
for what I long to be
for what I long to be
for what I truly am

Dead
To be gone from this world
Dead
And buried in the ground
Dead
I long to be dead
Its not what I was
But what ive become
Dead
Dead
Dead
I long to be dead
Its not what I was
But what ive become


The sweet kiss of steel
Caresses my skin
Life pours from my veins
I feel the dawn drawing ever closer
I raise the barrel to my skull
The path to nonexistence
I twist and grind it into my temple
Preparing for the end
I say my last goodbyes

Dead
To be gone from this world
Dead
And buried in the ground
Dead
I long to be dead
Its not what I was
But what ive become
Dead
Dead
Dead
I long to be dead
Its not what I was
But what ive become